Keeping myself busy -

well, I've been keeping myself busy. Not really to keep my mind off of my mom, but just so I don't sit and cry all day and replay the whole situation over in my head, over and over again. I have been doing a lot of organizing in the house which has been put off for way to long anyway. we are moving our kids rooms around and getting them moved into different rooms so that the baby has a room. Our oldest is going to have a room in the basement, so we are also working on that. It's almost done, so it should be ready when he returns from Germany. I'm also starting to get our DD's room done. I have my closet back which is nice. She had more clothes in our closet than I do! ;o)

I also have been put on an anti-depressant which has really helped. It doesn't keep me from grieving, but it takes the edge off. I can actually concentrate on other things and it's really helping me. I've been on it for only a week and I feel a lot better already. I still have my moments, but it has really helped me. I still have to be a wife and mother, and I can't sit around and be depressed all day. My mom wouldn't want that either. I miss her so much though. I talk to her sometimes. i know she is watching over us, and I can feel her presence every once in a while. Not like a ghost or anything, just the feeling that she is there. It's actually really nice. So, I have had a couple of really good days, and hope I have a lot more. I know there are going to be many, many hard days ahead, but it's so nice to have some good ones again.

thanks for "listening" -